Nothing makes me feel more exhausted when there is drama or angst in my life. Do you feel the same?  People spread rumours, people get jealous, and basically people are people in a sin-saturated world.

Solomon said that fools love to quarrel. People who carry hurt and distress in their personal life are usually out to prove something.  We don’t have to play their game.

It makes you look good when you avoid a fight— only fools love to quarrel. Proverbs 20:3

How to avoid a fight? Here are some thoughts.


  1. Spend as little time as possible with those people who want nothing other than to fight, argue and get you upset.
  • Unfortunately they may be family members, so you need God’s grace when you have to be with them and take care of what comes squeaking past those ruby lips.
  • Unfortunately, they may be an ex or his family. Communicating through text and email is an option to keep things factual and to the point unless you use all kinds of emoji and other symbols!!! Oops! Separation and divorce bring out more emotions than thought possible because they are matters of the heart.  Some say, “Bring it on” and love to fight.  No one wins with fighting except the legal profession. Being fair is the best game despite the unfair break-up. Being mean and fighting will only make it worse. Solomon was right, it will make you look good and you will feel you did your best without continual arguing and fighting.
  1. Walk away when those who love to quarrel start on their rampage. It’s like the humorous Staples© television commercial when the women yells at her husband who is sitting in their car to…”Start the car, start the car!” Excuse yourself and walk the opposite way. If they continue to badger you,
  2. Ask God for His wisdom in what you say and how you react. Comments such as, “I’ll have to think on that”, or “that is interesting”, or “I would appreciate not talking about that now” can defuse an argument. One person told me to say “just a minute, I want to write that down to think about it”. They may get mad, but you can excuse yourself saying ‘another time’.  It could allow you time to process what they said and how to deal with it. Bottom line, it is God’s wisdom that will help you know when to say something or keep your mouth closed. If you know you will be with people who are like that, bathe that time in prayer.

People will see your reaction when you don’t start a fight or avoid one. It will go a long way in how people view your character. That doesn’t mean anyone has to be a dishrag, but it does mean that quarreling and saying stuff only to regret later will be at a minimum.

At the end of the day, you will be glad that you avoid fights as much as possible and use strategies that will lessen the need for others to find you so they can quarrel.

Hey, Solomon said it….if we want to look good and not look like a fool…don’t quarrel for the sake of quarreling.  Easier said than done, but it can be accomplished.  Wisdom is your friend and will help as each situation comes your way.


  • Begin your day asking for God’s wisdom in your journey
  • When someone starts to quarrel, try and defuse it right away
  • Bathe your time in prayer before you are with argumentative people
  • Live for God’s Truth…YOU WILL LOOK GOOD!





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