You are Special. You are God’s creation.
In the movie, The Help, the maid would look into the little girl eyes who she took care of and say, “You is Kind. You is smart, You is important”.
Respect isn’t something that comes naturally. We live in a selfish world where it seems everyone is out for Number One…themselves!
God thinks differently.
King David said, For you created my inmost being; you knit me together in my mother’s womb. I praise you because I am fearfully and wonderfully made; your works are wonderful, I know that full well. Psalm 139:13, 14 (CEV)
As a person of worth in God’s eyes, we have to believe and live it. We teach our kids on how to be treated and what is acceptable and unacceptable, but sometimes I think we forget to practice it on ourselves.
Our respect level is plummeted when a spouse deserts us. We can have feelings of unworthiness and end up making decisions only to please others.
Be on the winning side!!! Understand you are a PERSON OF WORTH IN GOD’S EYES!
If so, then when situations come up, you will be able to have a clear understanding on how to respect yourself.
- When your ex is unreasonable, it is time to respect yourself. Take the positive resources of a counselor, pastor, legal offices, and friends to work through it. Our perspective is usually blurred and we need advice.
- If you feel it is time to date, respect yourself. Sadly, some are only out for what they want.
- One woman told me that a guy she was interested in invited her to stay at a hotel where he was lecturing. She arrived late at night, slept with him and then that was it. She drove about 6 hours for what she thought was going to be a wonderful time, only to have him get some sexual release. She never heard from him again.
- Another woman said that the guy she was dating threatened to break up with her unless she had sex with him.
- Others have used single mom’s money, their babysitting services, and pats on the back.
Take time to begin to love yourself. Find how who you are. Spend time with you! Define in your mind what you want in a relationship and how you want to be treated.
Single moms are lonely and want to be loved, cherished, and supported and the defining moment will be if respect leads them. Teaching your children the meaning of respect will be invaluable. My girls loved to celebrate with me and we respected each other. My tiara wasn’t real but I felt loved, cherished, and respected!
Ask yourself these questions.
- Does he want you for physical, sexual reasons?
- Does he only see you when and if he is available?
- There is a saying, ‘Why buy the cow when you can get the milk for free’? Is the man you are dating only interested in a physical relationship and won’t commit to you as a marriage partner?
- Are you losing who you are so you can stay in a relationship?
- If you told the guy that you have certain healthy boundaries for you and your kids, would he stick around?
- Does he truly respect who you are and feel you need to be treated as a royal priesthood? I am not saying it is all about you, but what it means is having your mind and your physical body treated as precious. Do you?
But you are God’s chosen and special people. You are a group of royal priests and a holy nation. God has brought you out of the darkness into his marvelous light. Now you must tell all the wonderful things that he has done. 1 Peter 2:9 (CEV)
This blog might sound like pretty strong words. I am passionate about this because I have experienced some hurtful, disrespectful men and people in my life. Boundaries safe guarded myself and my girls. God knows you are special and so should others.
On the flipside, as a single mom you will need to respect people too. They are not at your beck and call, and a man doesn’t fulfill all your needs. As you learn to respect your mind, body, and soul, clarity will come. Find a safe friend that will help you work through this if you are struggling with the topic of respect.
- How do you define RESPECT?
- If you are dating, how is the fellow treating you?
- If you are not dating, how are others treating you?
- What are some positive steps and healthy boundaries that will help you gain respect?
- God loves you and believes you are a special and chosen person.
Next Week’s Topic: Mr. Right?
YOU CAN DO THIS!