Am I being punished?

When life spirals and the pain is unbearable wondering how we are going to survive, we can find ourselves asking: What did I do? Why did this happen? How will it get fixed?


We want answers. Without them, I struggle. I asked God if I was being punished because I was a single mom. What had I done that made my ex have an affair and leave?

True Fact: an extra-marital affair does not justify a dissatisfied spouse.

May I share some personal thoughts in hopes it will encourage you to work through this question in your journey?

  1. Others choices have a rippling effect on our life. It doesn’t seem fair. Many ID-10031174single moms are left holding on to responsibilities and a life they didn’t choose. It seems they are paying for someone else’s sin. I felt that. History continues to repeat itself with story after story of selfish decisions affecting innocent people. Does God approve? No. Will God deal with them? Yes, at some point. Will God help us? Absolutely Yes! God gives everyone an opportunity to live with their life of choices and gave us His Scriptures as a guide book.

King David’s was unjustly treated and found himself hiding in dark caves and running from people who were jealous of him. Psalm 13:1-2 (CEV), How much longer, Lord, will you forget about me?  Will it be forever?  How long will you hide? How long must I be confused and miserable all day?

Other’s choices and sins do affect us. It isn’t fair but a Reality. God isn’t punishing us but the rippling effect of other’s selfish acts affect us.

  1. ID-10056784 (1)Our Choices have a rippling effect on our life. It only takes a second to say or do something we regret. Because of that, single moms can be left holding on to a responsibility and life they don’t want. It is a tough to talk about our mistakes. Maybe you had an affair or were verbally abusive to your husband. Your choices of manipulation are still hanging in the air. Your abuse of credit cards had your family on the verge of bankruptcy. I have listened to women who said they regret how they yelled and put down their husband and now that he is gone, they realized their mistake.

I wasn’t perfect in my marriage.  None of us are. Our wrong choices certainly have a cause and effect which can lead to a self-inflected punishment and unfortunately those around us.

Asking forgiveness from God and my ex about my errors began a new healing process. Even if your ex doesn’t want to hear this, God does! This will begin a journey of healing. We can make healthy choices for us and that will cause a healthy rippling effect as we lead our kids.

Psalm 38:18 (CEV), I told you my sins, and I am sorry for them.

ID-1003148583. God Choices will have a rippling effect on our life.

I can guarantee God is the BEST guide for your life to make wise choices. Life will always have suffering and trials so we need His wisdom. We cannot undo the things we have done or the hurtful things that have been done to us, but with God’s help we can hit the re-start button and begin again! God is a God of new starts as He walks with you to help you change and grow. Christ’s death on the cross is THE wonderful rippling gift to us.

Yes, sometimes God does punish. That is cause and effect. How we deal with it will be up to us. His love is unending.  Also, God is in the business of using our life situations for positive things. Maybe God knows that these trials will develop you with strong character whether it was a rippling effect of what your ex did or something you choose to do. Listening to Him will be the best choice you will make for your life.  Don’t waste this trial.  God is a God of mercy and love and He knows best. Then you can sing as King David did,

Psalm 13:5, 6 (CEV) I trust your love, and I feel like celebrating because you rescued me. You have been good to me, Lord, and I will sing about you.

ID-100169204OPEN YOUR TOOL BOX: So many Choices! Lots to ponder!


Next Week’s Topic: I Wanna Have Some Fun!

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