Suitcases were packed, lists checked off, and now it was time to give hugs and say so-long to the girls. Summer vacation had arrived and they were off to spend time with their dad.
This time can be emotional for everyone involved. A Mom’s heart is heavy saying so long praying the children will adjust. You may find yourself feeling very overwhelmed and anxious. There is a re-adjustment for moms to return to a quiet, empty house.
This is what helped me adjust.
1. Schedule a time to talk on the phone with the kids. If the ex is willing, schedule a time to talk to the children mid-vacation. Try to be positive and excited with them about what they are doing. Thank your ex for this time to talk to them. I found it was best not to chat to them before bed so it didn’t get them upset missing me before settling in for the night. Once they left for a holiday, my girls knew they had an option to chat and it seemed to relax them. I assured them I loved them. I let them know I hoped they would have a fun time and would see them soon.
2. Trust God- Release your children to God. It can be a helpless feeling for you. Maybe your children have a hard time with adjustment or anxiety. There are new house rules and your ex has to adjust to having the kids around full-time. Maybe you have a fear that the kids won’t want to come home. Single moms have shared their concern about the environment their children are going to. I encourage you if things become negative for your children during this time; you have a plan in place.
I wish I had an easy solution but I don’t. What I do know, is that God sees and He says to give Him your worries. Can you ask a few trusted friends and family to partner with you in prayer? You don’t have to do this alone. Even in the best of situations pray and trust.
Psalm 94: 18-19 `When I felt my feet slipping, you came with your love and kept me steady. And when I was burdened with worries, you comforted me and made me feel secure’.
3. Refresh yourself. Schedule time to read, have bubble baths with lots of candles, go to a movie, work on a craft, grab a bike and go for a ride, meet with girlfriends, and paint your toenails! It is hard to schedule time for yourself when the kids are home so this is the time to pamper yourself. Make a list of things you would like to do and have some fun. You don`t have to feel guilty about doing this. This is your time to become refreshed. I found myself packing a picnic lunch, getting in my car for a destination unknown with a lawn chair and book. I called it my ‘Linda Time’.
Let summer not only be a time to pack suitcases, but a time to trust God and refresh yourself.
- Release your children to God
- Schedule a time with your ex to talk to your kiddos
- Make a list of some things you have wanted to do but never had the time
- With this list, make sure you do some
- Ask a few people to pray for all involved during this separation
- Dust off the bike and go for a ride!
YOU CAN DO THIS!!!!!